The biggest shopping centre in east Surabaya which was opened since the year 199…. It located in Dharmahusada Indah Timur 37 Street, in the middle of the prestigious east Surabaya region, this mall became the only one that was most complete. Shopping facilities with this modern interior had a great number counter on each floors. it also have the quite big supermarket which provided daily necessity, the department store and the boutique with the latest collection fashion, the game centre with the skill game collection that futuristic was various types from children to the adult with the choice of the toy import and local. The cinema with 5 studios completed with the digital sound that played newest Hollywood films and local, the jewelry shop, the sport shop, the beauty salon, the book shop as well as various restaurant sorts and cafĂ© all could be found by you here.
Moreover, in the ground floor of this Galaxy Mall was also used as the exhibition site like the exhibition of housing & property, the automotive exhibition, the furniture exhibition and et cetera. Supported with strategic location that could be covered with public transport or for you who brought the personal vehicle was provided the area parked that enough areas with the adequate security system, this made the visitors feel comfortable shopped or only went for a walk to release the fatigue)

i think your paragraph is enough good
BalasHapusbut i confuse about your sentence
"The biggest shopping centre in east Surabaya which was opened since the year 199…"
maybe you can edit it to become a good paragraph
By: Yulia Primita Sari
BalasHapus(120810494G)
-I think, you describe clearly.........
- about your grammar, I think you have some mistakess.........
- I hope you have to make three paragraph and your paragraph is not neat.........
Well,,
BalasHapusThat's good I think....
But When did Galaxy Mall build up? You didn't explain it clearly..(since 199...)
And the paragraph should be 3 paragraph, right?..
But it's okay..
You can write a good paragraph next time..
Commented by: Rulyana (120810493 G)
By:wildania
BalasHapusyour paragraph is good.
but,When Galaxy Mall build up?
.................(since 199..)and.....walk to release the fatique)but(.)
hey !
BalasHapusyour writing product is good .
but i found some mistakes .
i suggest you to correct it again .
keep in good writing . :))
Ranti P Nastiti : 120810190G
hello nadia..
BalasHapusThis is my comment
I think your writing is good and clearly
So,keep in good writing
That's all
120810492G
i think your paragraph good enough
BalasHapusand you describe clearly
and be creative again
kurnia (120810488G)
i think your paragraph is good enough.
BalasHapusyou describe a lot of galaxy mall.
but i found some mistakes in your paragraph.
maybe next time you can do better..
hey. . nahdiyah. .
BalasHapusi think your paragraph its so clearly. . but i agree with rulyana comment. .
so be carefull for next duty.
Rico ( 120810490 G )
you describe about galaxy mall specific,..
BalasHapusso far,.I like your writing...
elok (120810486G)